Sibling refuses to give sister the family dog after years of solely taking care of him, despite sister's claims he is legally hers: 'She thinks he's a toy with no feelings'

Author image for Bar Mor Hazut
Bar Mor Hazut • Senior Editor
Mar 9, 2026 5:00 PM EDT

Who is considered more of a dog owner, the one who got the dog, or the one who actually takes care of the pupper?

Every family has a hooman who is the most attached to the family dog, and usually, it is not the person who initially suggested getting a dog. We all know the heartwarming stories of the connections made by the dad and the dog he never wanted, but everyone in the family ends up getting attached to the new pupper, sometimes even more than Dad.

Seven years ago, a sister adopted a dog, but she never truly got attached to the pawdorable pup. Instead, the person who ended up actually taking care of him was the sister's sibling, who became a lot more connected to the doggo than anyone expected.

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  • Since the sister never really got attached, it wasn't long before the ownership was automatically moved to the sibling. They took the pupper in, were always the ones who walked him, fed him, and even paid for all the vet visits.

    For all intents and purposes, the sibling became the dog's owner.

    Now, seven years later, the sister is moving states and has suddenly decided she wants to take “her” dog with her. It doesn't matter to her that she basically ignored the pup for years; in her eyes, the dog is technically hers, so he should move with her to a whole other state. Her sibling, on the other hand, refuses to give up the pup to whom they got so attached. The doggo has been living exclusively with them for years; they have given him their heart and soul, and they refuse to give it all up now. Not to mention, how can they even trust the sister to take care of the dog after years of obvious neglect?

    The family is split between the two siblings, some thinking the sister should take the dog back, and others believing she has no right to claim ownership after all these years. Keep scrolling to read the full story to decide which side you are on.

  • 01
    A Woman Reading a Book while Sitting on a Windowsill with Her Shiba Inu Dog
    via Vitaly Gariev

    A Woman Reading a Book while Sitting on a Windowsill with Her Shiba Inu Dog.

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 02

    AITAH for refusing to give my sister the “family dog” after I secretly paid all the vet bills for years?

    So this has turned into a whole family situation and now a couple of people are telling me I'm being petty and childish, but I honestly don't think I am.
    via Due_Bowl_7851
  • 03
    About 7 years ago my sister adopted a puppy. Technically the dog was "hers", but she lived with me at the time so the dog ended up bonding with me a lot.
    via Due_Bowl_7851
  • 04
    I work from home so I was the one walking him, feeding him half the time, taking him to the park etc.
    via Due_Bowl_7851
  • 05
    About a year after she got him she started traveling a lot for work. Like gone for weeks at a time.
    via Due_Bowl_7851
  • 06
    So the dog basically stayed with me most of the time anyway. Here's the part she doesn't really acknowledge, she's so careless about his welfare or anything she never even cares to ask, the dog started having some health issues when he was about 3years old at the time.
    via Due_Bowl_7851
  • 07
    It was Nothing crazy but he needed regular vet visits, medication, checkups and all that, I always sorted the bills.
    via Due_Bowl_7851
  • 08
    My sister would say she'd pay me back but it never really happened. After a while I just stopped asking because it was awkward and I didn't want the dog to go without treatment.
    via Due_Bowl_7851
  • 09
    Over the years I've probably spent a few thousand on vet bills, food, grooming, and honestly just normal stuff like toys and beds.
    via Due_Bowl_7851
  • 10
    I never kept receipts because at the time it felt weird to treat it like a transaction.
    via Due_Bowl_7851
  • 11
    Fast forward to now. She's moving to another state and suddenly wants to "take her dog back".
    via Due_Bowl_7851
  • 12
    The dog is 8 now and has lived with me full time for the last 4 years.
    via Due_Bowl_7851
  • 13
    Shiba Inu dog standing in a backyard
    via Aflo Images

    Shiba Inu dog standing in a backyard.

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 14
    When she told me this I said I'm not comfortable with that. The dog is settled here, he's older now, and I've basically been his owner for years.
    via Due_Bowl_7851
  • 15
    Also selfishly yeah I'm attached to him at this point. She got really upset and said I'm stealing her dog and that helping with the dog financially didn't make him mine.
    via Due_Bowl_7851
  • 16
    My parents are kinda split. My mom thinks the dog should stay where he's comfortable but my dad says technically it's her dog.
    via Due_Bowl_7851
  • 17
    My sister also said if it's "about the money" she could try to pay me back but that's not even really the point anymore.
    via Due_Bowl_7851
  • 18
    Now it's turned into a whole argument and some relatives are messaging me saying I'm being stubborn and making things harder when she's already stressed about moving.
    via Due_Bowl_7851
  • 19
    I feel like after 7 years and especially the last 4 of the dog living with me full time it's not crazy that I don't want him uprooted and taken across the country.
    via Due_Bowl_7851
  • 20
    But maybe I'm too emotionally involved to see it clearly. AITA?
    via Due_Bowl_7851
  • 21
    MistressJacklyn Hyde I feel NTA. You had the dog for 4 years! She hasn't paid for food or maintenance. Nothing. The dog has bonded with you. Not sure why your sister suddenly wants (or even time) for the dog, but I wouldn't give it up.
    via MistressJacklynHyde
  • 22
    Due_Bowl_7851 Original Poster's Reply it really hurts, i made a lot of sacrifices and i don't regret doing them but it hurts.
    via Due_Bowl_7851
  • 23
    Nanabanafofana NTA. Under the law, dogs are a property. I know they are really family, but legally, they are property. Based on your accounting and timetable, she has abandoned the dog. The dog is now yours. Go get her micro chipped in your name.
    via Nanabanafofana
  • 24
    Due_Bowl_7851 Original Poster's Reply thanks guys, i'm definitely using this against her if to comes to it
    via Due_Bowl_7851
  • 25
    Classic_Ad3987 Take the dog to your vet and get him chipped. Now you have legal proof that he is yours. If your sister complains to others, ask her to show you and them receipts for vet visits, food, toys, etc.
    via Classic_Ad3987
  • 26
    Due_Bowl_7851 Original Poster's Reply sounds like the ideal way to protect the dog
    via Due_Bowl_7851
  • 27
    Flimsy-Fortune-6437 It's not about you or your sister. The dog is a living, breathing being. It's about what's best for him. He's bonded with you. Also, she doesn't have a track record of having the resources or inclination to take care of him and as he gets older he'll need more and more expensive care. It's best for the dog for him to stay with you.
    via Flimsy-Fortune-6437
  • 28
    Due_Bowl_7851 Original Poster's Reply AGREED!!! some people still see dogs like play things in 2026
    via Due_Bowl_7851
  • 29
    13ex_G Nta she abandoned the dog. They are not toys to be forgotten. Keep the dog.
    via 13ex_G
  • 30
    Due_Bowl_7851 Original Poster's Reply she thinks they are toys with no feelings, smh.
    via Due_Bowl_7851
  • 31
    Bethechangeurme Tell her new house, new dog. Let the poor thing live his last years with you, without the stress of moving and getting acclimated to new and strange surroundings. She wants a dog, go to the pound and get one.
    via Bethechangeurme
  • 32
    Due_Bowl_7851 Original Poster's Reply i'm not letting her have him, i can't stand seeing him being treated like trash
    via Due_Bowl_7851
  • 33
    sagpluto NTA. If she actually cared about the dog she'd know keeping him where he's comfortable... which is with you.
    via sagpluto
  • 34
    Due_Bowl_7851 Original Poster's Reply his well being is the least of her worries sadly
    via Due_Bowl_7851
  • 35
    Disastrous_Change662 NTA. You're right, it's not about the money. It's about, like it or not, the 'other' L-word. And cats and dogs are the same here, but it's the L- word from them, too. ...AND the house. But mostly the bond.
    via Disastrous_Change662
  • 36
    Due_Bowl_7851 Original Poster's Reply the bond is everything, she knows deep down she doesn't love the dog like i do
    via Due_Bowl_7851
  • 37
    Euphoric_Rope6296 I'd be concerned about her having the dog or any dog at this point. If she's been this way with it for the past eight years, I'd be worried about the dog being neglected or handed off to someone else.
    via Euphoric_Rope6296
  • 38
    Due_Bowl_7851 Original Poster's Reply it's really worrying, she doesn't deserve to own a dog
    via Due_Bowl_7851

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family drama dogs adoption siblings dog owner doggo family sister dog adoption Dog Rescue
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